March 26, 2004

Fictional Dance Teachers

A recent announcement by the government has promised millions of pounds to help young people, more commonly known as kids or children, gain access to high quality dance and music training around the UK.

The plans involve the creation of "dance training centres" around the country to train the little darlings in all things dance. Now forgive us if we are wrong but here in the Lab we thought there already were centres around the UK where kids could take part in dance classes and training programs? They're called National Dance Agencies and there are ten of them.

The scheme also promises money to help pay for this training, anything from £500 - £3,000 will be made available.

David Millband, minister for such matters, said in a statement to the Guardian Newspaper;

"We all remember Billy Elliot leaving his home town to train in London, I want to extend these opportunities to children similar to Billy so they can enjoy excellent training but still go to their local school and remain active participants in local artistic communities."

Presumably Mr Millband is aware that Billy Elliot is a fictional character. Article19 hopes that the teachers, training and ambitions for this project do not turn out to be just as fictional.

March 22, 2004

Desperately Seeking Credibility

Alleged "Pop Singer" Victoria Beckham is to begin supporting English National Ballet (stop laughing at the back).

English National Ballet's spokesperson said in a statement to the BBC;

"Victoria has said the ENB is close to her heart and we are discussing various ways she may be able to help us,"

We asked a leading spokesperson translator to interpret the above statement. Fauston Carpet of the Amsterdam Research and Science Enterprise told Article19 that the statement actually means;

"We're in discussions with Ms Beckham and we're humouring her until we can see how much cash she is going to give us because we have no money to spend as our management team is borderline incompetent to say nothing of the fact that our artistic team has all the vision of a goldfish with Alzheimer's!"

English National Ballet have denied they are suffering financial problems after a recently planned production of Les Liaisons Dangereuses had to be shelved because it was too expensive. ENB currently receives almost £6million from Arts Council England in annual subsidy.

March 20, 2004

Dodgy Back

Our thoughts today are with Micke Alm of Sweden, Articles19's erstwhile T-Shirt designer.

We received a report today that, and we are quoting verbatim on this;

"I sprained my back as I was putting on my socks"

We knew the Swedes were a bit passive and very soft but that is just ridiculous. We're sending Micke a pack of pain killers and some Sloggi "easy on" socks so the poor lamb can have an easier time of it!

March 06, 2004

Academy Entrants Announced

Some time ago we reported on a competition run by Arts Council England (ACE) and the BBC with a prize of £100,000 to make a dance film. The so-called "Dance Film Academy" will be held later in the year, in Wales of all places, and the format will be made into a documentary for BBC4. The press release blurb states;

"The five teams will spend the two weeks developing their idea and the most exciting, interesting or innovative will win the prize."

Readers are reminded that this is the UK and anything to do with film will almost certainly bear little resemblance to anything that is actually entertaining. (oooh, so young yet so cynical, Ed!)

The entrants for the academy have just been announced and they are as follows;

Jasmin Vardimon
Jane Mason
Sheron Wray
Rafael Bonachela
Magali Cherrier & Lucy Baldwyn

With the exception of the last two choreographers the others are all well established in UK contemporary dance. Article19 would like to applaud ACE for its usual level of open mindedness when it comes to selecting potential recipients for the opportunity to receive large sums of money.

March 05, 2004

DanceEast Another New Building

The building frenzy continues apace with the announcement that DanceEast has been awarded £2.5 million by Arts Council England (ACE) to build a new centre for dance. The facility will be built in Ipswich as part of a large scale "urban regeneration" which means the building will be surrounded by "executive apartments" and "theme bars".

The building will come with the usual list of features, such as a studio theatre, additional studios, pilates room, etc, etc.

The development follows the upgrades and new buildings either opened or in development by DanceXchange, DanceCity, DanceBase and The Place. The UK is also home to four almost new or redeveloped dance schools in the shape of Northern School, London School of Contemporay Dance, Laban and The Scottish School of Contemporary Dance.

On the surface it would seem that all is looking particularly rosy for dance in the UK. A quick read of of Helen Parlor's editorial on dancer's pay however will snap you back to reality fairly quickly.

New buildings are great but until ACE invests millions in the dancers who make the profession work then Article19's response to these new buildings will remain muted to say the least.