November 2003 Archives

Rehearsals are going well but I have mixed feelings about the piece. I'm so desperate to get on stage that I've got to a state of mind where I just don't care what the choreography is but some of it is just so damn jazzy. We even spin on our knees then punch our arms out in fists!

Lisa (the choreographer and foundation student teacher) is good at leading rehearsals. She's an absolute perfectionist and keeps us going at things until they're ridiculously accurate which is great. I think it's one of the best ways of training yourself to be a performing monkey (which is of course very important). However, she is human and the rehearsals are getting quite pressurized and stressful.

We were doing a lot of "cleaning" today and one/two of my friends were getting tonnes of corrections and bollockings when they weren't paying attention which made them stressed. (well get it right then!) But even though I had a great day and was rehearsing the whole time and hardly away from centre stage, when I was walking home their stress had rubbed off on me and I was completely pissed off. It was quite bizarre - but I recuperated with a nice mug of tea and some texts to my boyfriend kind of guy.

Boyfriend? - I went clubbing two weeks ago and there was a guy dancing kind of insanely and kind of contemporaryish (which was off putting) but one of the people I'd 'turned down' as it were - earlier, was trying to come on to me again (not to mention the scary guy who said in a perverted, gruff, gravelly voice "We shall dance, you shall dance better than me, but we shall dance") and I escaped into the welcome embrace of the scary dancer guy. Who turned out to be a fantastic dirty dancer and kisser - as well as a person who started lifting me and throwing me around (on the dancefloor).

Which I wouldn't have trusted him to do if I hadn't originally thought he was some kind of dance student! Anyway, he turned out to be a really great guy who is also a doctor. And is only twenty six and a young twenty six year old at that! I saw him last weekend and I'm seeing him again this weekend yey. Unfortunately I'm going to miss the second year theatre performance which I'm annoyed about but hey, what can you do?

tbc

Production has started and things are going well....So far we've all created little duets with a kind of spanish/tango feel to them and then played around with composition. Mine and Gillian's is being used at the start of a piece of music - don't know if that's the start of our piece or not though with my two best friends dancing it as well. yey.

The rehearsal was fun(ha ha) when we were teaching it and setting it to counts etc I can be far too much of a perfectionist and three of the four of us were stressed to the point where every little detail is the most important thing in the world. Luckily none of us took anything personally but the tension really couldn't get much higher. I like working with stress but sometimes you do start to wonder.

We even managed to piss the whole class of when everyone was supposed to be setting to counts and there's a big 123 223 323....rhythm to set it to but our duets are at the intro part of the music which is all melody and no discernible rhythm and the couple of times we reset the cd player so we could rehearse properly caused a little bit of controversy.

We also had our written feedback sheets today and lots of people were sitting in one of the studios talking about them. One girl said that Dave and Pete had said her turning was rubbish in the tutorial but they had given her a three for turning on the feedback sheet (she felt that was contradictory) Without thinking I said loudly that threes were crap (we were marked out of 5) only to be met by a huge chorus of "three's are good" "three means average" "threes are fine" blah blah blah. Foot, mouth, Sheep disease....

To stand up for myself, in my tutorial everything I'd been given a three for was discussed in the, this is negative what are you going to do about it way. For example, Pete:"Three for progress, does that surprise you?"

I was annoyed/upset with my contemporary mark, 68 since you asked. Flexibility let me down but I have made it to Yoga twice this week and I'm going to find a class for tomorrow. I'm finding it hard to adjust to the fact that I got a higher grade in ballet than contemporary when I'd had maybe 20 ballet lessons before coming to this school yet had been doing contemporary for three years. Just goes to show that Graham is not the technique for me! At all.

Also I have to work on being a performing monkey, I'm in danger of being too much a technician in ballet (instead of letting go, enjoying myself and projecting) and on my contemporary feedback I had the very pointed statement "Make it intelligent."

there is work to be done....

Before I jump into bed with the drama of it all, I think I may have neglected to mention/gone into detail about having ballet classes with Pete (Sir Peter Royston to those in the know lol). Anyway they were a lot harder to get through than Sheena's ballet classes because if not every person in the room was working their arse off to get through the exercise then he'd keep us on it until we did. Now think about that in relation to fondu and développé exercises - you will get your legs beyond 90degrees you will!

He also gave us "set" classes which meant we did exactly the same exercises every lesson for the week with the point being that it really made your muscles work and improve - but Sheena (regular ballet teacher and all round fantastic person) doesn't approve of that kind of class because it does nothing for your mind and the dancer can't do anything more than those few exercises. I have a good memory for exercises so I'm inclined towards Sheena's side of the argument.

I started to almost enjoy the Graham stuff again when the exercises were made more complicated, for example in the "openings" we had port de bras and leg extensions to contend with, while shifting our hips and heads so it was a lot more interesting to do and dance. But then we stopped doing these complicated versions because we were rehearsing for our assesment class.

Dave and Sheena seemed to have very different approaches to this - Dave gave us a class which we'd been made to memorise the week beforehand except for one tondu exercise he made up on the day (heel up, toes off, toes down, heel down, repeat, tondu, tondu, high retiré, replace. Other side, do it again then twice in second(e)! soo complicated lol)

Whereas Sheena gave us an unknown class which was simpler than our usual classes and a travelling exercise which we pretended that we hadn't been rehearsing for three weeks (sissone fermé avant, sissone fermé avant, sissone ouvert avant, pas de bourré dessous, (petit?) passé retiré (I'm just chucking the acute accents in randomly btw because I've learnt how to make the computer do them with a keyboard shortcut) developpé posé with third arabesque, fondu, pas de bourré dessous, changement). Sheena's class was more simple than usual except for the rond de jambe exercise which could hardly have been more complicated with fondus, sutinues, tempo changes, rond de jambes en l'air and grande rond de jambes en l'air!) not to mention ports de bras!!!

Anyway I survived but I haven't sweated like that in ballet for a long time. Except I really should do....hmm reflection on practice needed here methinks!

Contemporary went well I thought - I pushed myself hard but tried not to stress through it because I know I can do it and if I relaxed a bit I wouldn't block myself. I made a couple of silly mistakes in the middle when my body would either not get the exercise or couldn't work out exactly what the difference/change is between four bouncing demi plies into four little sautés. But I was well hidden by the crowd so I don't think it would have counted against me much.

We had the tutorial feedback session the same day as the assesment! Now that's great organisation! Everything we are working on can apparently be split into 20 different categories and we got a mark out of five for each one. Categories include things like, strength, flexiblity, arms, turning, centre, fluidity, musicality, attack (something they are very big on here), upper body, legs, feet, epaulément, progress, etc. I got threes for flexibility, turning, fludity! and feet - some of which improved in the centre. Pete was surprised that I was better in the centre than at the barre and so was I! apparently it all comes together! I got a 5 for arms which I'm very proud of because last year I thought I looked like an ape with my arms in seconde!

And also I appeared very musical (5) which I was surprised at because I don't think I am and if the rhythm is complicated it takes me a long time to find it! I also counted the whole way through every exercise which probably swung it my way. Anyway the whole thing was marked out of 100 (which mathematicians will have worked out already unlike me! lol) and 75 and above is a distinction. I scored 77 wahey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was second(e) highest in the class, beaten only by the new girl Emma (my best friend ahh!) but she's done ballet for two years and can do pointe work. And she only got one point higher than me! It was quite depressing that the class was on a monday because I have rubbish turn out on mondays - not really a good excuse for a future pro but hey, I've still got time on my side! And I did have really bad turn out on the day - I reckon I could have got an extra point for turn out by friday! The two irritating marks were 3 for fluidity - they say I can be clonkey! I am completely blaming the teaching for this.

In Contemporary we never ever work on fluidity, in fact in one exercise Dave said that he wanted the arm not to move in a circular position but be place, by place, by place. And in Emma's tutorial they discussed that exercise and said she wasn't fluid. Our theory is that Pete said it wasn't fluid and should be and Dave conveniently forgot that he had set it that way. Last year I was always being cast as the soft fluid dancer (in release technique!!) and the way we are made to be exageratedly muscular in every exercise is why fluidity doesn't come into anything here. Grr grr grr. Hippocritical teachers!

Dave didn't go over my contemporary grades mark by mark but just went over my bad points and he said that while I'm the most flexible male in the class in another institution I would be bottom of the pile. He said I have to be as flexible as the girls (maybe he's projecting his own ambitions onto me) and surprisingly that my pelvis was "up" but I now I have to make it go more and more. Fair enough but he didn't say anything positive - including that I was "above average" but he didn't think I would be in the distinction category. Well without being completely big headed, if I haven't got a distinction in contemporary then no one else in the class will have one!

They also gave me a three for progress and Pete asked, quite nicely, if that surprised me? It didn't because I haven't been pushing myself as hard as I did last year but there isn't anywhere I can push myself - none of the material in class is challenging at all. The only thing I can direct my energy towards will be flexibility (more on this later, I have good news). He also contradicted himself slightly by saying that I was one of the people who was always ready for class and ready to go at the beginning of each exercise, not fiddling with clothes or anything and that I was working hard. So working hard and not progressing eh?

Good news about flexibility.....I went to Yoga today!!! and loved it! The bizarre thing is I don't feel like I'm an unflexible person - my first dance teacher tends to surprise me by saying positive things about my flexibility. I think the big problem I have here is never feeling warm enough to stretch and then panicking (literally panicking). But I love the safety of a yoga class with a qualified person to trust so I'm going to go three nights a week. Watch me!

Anyway someones chatting to me on msn so I've finished this off before I lose it all through malpractice!!

Lewis xxx
(feeling fairly good about life x

I went to Mardi Gras (which in Dundee is a straight nightclub not a name of a gay festival or a pancake centered Christian holiday) last night, even though I'd vowed never to go there! I wasn't really dressed up (Halloween remember) but I made a last minute effort with a black top which has lots of see-through lines (think Chicago) and some creative efforts with (stolen) housemate's make up.

Anyway about 5 minutes into being on the dancefloor a guy did this strange pinching thing to my side and was smiling and then dancing near me but that was that. However, I decided to not think about anything else but this guy that night and would spend all my time working out where he was when my friends wanted to wander around the club.

The guy (who was wearing a red tshirt and big red wings and carrying a magic fairy wand lol oh yeh and red devil horns too) got into one of the cages beside the dj booth and lo and behold I just happened to be standing with one of my friends beneath it! Anyway, after ages of me trying to make eye contact he did start looking at me and then he was blatantly talking to his friend about me. So far so good. I did see him pull a kind of whiny I don't think so face at one point which was discouraging but maybe his friend had asked "why don't you go and talk to him (me)" as opposed to what I thought last night!

Anyway he got out of the booth but Wendy (friend) and I had decided to walk off already and I had eye contact with red wings but he sort of shook his head. I really overanalyse things some time. Anyway, we got on the dance floor and he had followed us. Lots of eye contact and smiling.....yey yey yey. Justin Trousersnake's "Can I leave wid u" song came on and guess which lines we mouthed to each other. How school disco!

He started dancing closer to me and then somehow we were back to back...

I'm sure I hit save not publish!!!!!

...anyway we were dancing together and then him and his friend (female) wandered off. I decided to be quite forward and I got a pen from the dj booth and wrote my number on the back of my Scottish Ballet ticket and the next time I walked past him I handed him it. Wendy said that was a bit sly, but hey.

The next time he walked past me he grabbed hold of my hand (then let go boohoo) but that was obviously a good time to go dancing again! I grabbed him from behind and before I knew it we were getting off with each other in the middle of a straight nightclub! Wahey!

Apparently we were being stared at by all and sundry but you know me well enough by now to know that doesn't bother me at all!!!!

Eventually I found out his name, age and that he's a law student at Abertay Uni.

When he asked me my age it took me a while to think about it and I'm sure I sounded like I was lying. It's also really odd to tell some one much taller than you that you are two years older than them. (I'm only just twenty so it doesn't really matter!!!!)

Anyway - I really really hope he calls me. And soon!!!! And that he's not playing any of those stupid - I won't call too soon in case I look desperate games - because I'm desperate and I really want him to call soon! lol!!

Then again if he never calls I just suck which is really bad. Arrgh!!

Dance related topics.....We had Pete Royston for ballet for most of the week which was fantastic. He's really strict and can explain things extremely well. The only thing that irritated me was how he told us to squeeze our lemons all the time! Why oh why? Is that the terminology they use at the Royal Ballet School (where Pete trained)? However, Dave wants us to start saying Gluteus Maximus so that we are more than able to do our anatomy tests next year (If I'm still here). But that won't help people remember the gluteus medius or minimus will it Dave???? No, I don't think so somehow.

For some reason on friday doing our stretching sequence in second hurt more than ever. I hate that exercise because I can not use it to stretch at all and all I do is grip like absolute hell onto my hip flexors in order to pull my pelvis up. The pain is excruciating and the benefits nil. DUMB DUMB DUMB.

We're spending a lot of time preparing for our assessment classes at the moment - it all seems a bit ridiculous though. All we will do are exercises which are far more simple than the things we do in everyday class, just to make us look good in the assesments. We do practically the same classes everyday of the week anyway (I'm not joking, on friday Dave just sat on a chair and said we'll just go straight through the floor work, 5678 and everyone knew what to do) so why don't they just teach us like normal and actually get a fair assesment of the standard - I won't look crap and I don't care if other people do, it's only because some of them still aren't putting any physical energy into their bodies.